CHASTITY BITES (2013)

 Posted by on April 13, 2015  Comedy, Genres, HCF Reviews, Horror
Apr 132015
 

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chastity-bites

CHASTITY BITES (2013)
Directed by John V. Knowles

Leah and Katharine are two outsiders who attend San Griento High School. The pretty in pink high school clique of bimbos often poke fun at the duo, which really bothers Katharine but not so much Leah. Leah’s looking for her next big scoop for the school paper and overhears how the bimbos have a pact to lose their virginity at the same time. Worried about their daughters futures, the PTA arrange for European¬†abstinence lecturer Liz Betho to visit the school to educate the female teens on the importance of keeping pure until marriage. Naming the programme the Virginity Action Group, Liz signs up the bimbos to be virginity leaders and encourages all the girls to come to her classes. Katharine desperately wants to join the VAG clan but naturally cynical Leah has her suspicions about the group and organiser Liz. With women and girls going missing around the time of the arrival of Liz Betho, could Leah’s suspicions be right?

CHASTITY BITES is a fun-filled, witty horror comedy from first-time feature director John V. Knowles. Presented as a teen movie – one that’s quite happy poking fun at itself and embracing the high school cliches – CHASTITY BITES tells the story of good vs evil. On one side is Liz Batho, a woman who’s passionately trying to prevent San Griento’s teenage girls from giving themselves to boys. On the other is aspiring journalist Leah, a feminist who’s trying to save her best friend from what she suspects is a cult. Her penchant for digging around for stories comes into good use as she tries to unearth the truth about San Griento’s new visitor.

Louise Griffiths plays the stunning Liz Batho. With her English accent and tales of travel throughout various European cities, Liz charms the socks off the students and the parents alike, particularly with the housewife mothers of the girl clique who’ll do anything to keep themselves young. Imagine their delight when Liz offers to share her secret treatment she uses to keep herself looking youthful. With near enough everyone in the school falling under Liz’s spell, ballsy Leah (a fantastic Allison Scagliotti) must do all she can to expose the true nature of her visit before it’s too late.

Despite its high school environment and comedic script and approach, CHASTITY BITES displays its fair share of grisly scenes made all the more shocking due to the sugar-coated setting. If you imagine Clueless featuring a cloaked serial killer slicing throats of young women, then you’ll get the idea of what CHASTITY BITES is all about. It’s fun, clever and an absolute hoot to watch as a horror fan. Yes, it may not be as bloodthirsty or as frightening as Scream is, but it’s still as entertaining in its own right and caters for a much wider audience with its comedy horror blend.

Packed with one-liners, caricaturish characters and a pleasantly upbeat charm, CHASTITY BITES is all the fun without having to take your clothes off!

Rating: ★★★★★★★☆☆☆

Bat

BatI love prosthetic effects, stop-motion animation and gore, but most of all I love a good story! I adore B-movies and exploitation films in many of their guises and also have a soft spot for creature features. I review a wide range of media including movies, TV series, books and videogames. I'm a massive fan of author Hunter S. Thompson and I enjoy various genre of videogames with Kingdom Hearts and Harvest Moon two of my all time favs. Currently playing: Silent Hill

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