Sep 112015


No one wants to see a remake of Dario Argento’s masterpiece, Suspiria, yet talk of a remake has reared its ugly head again.

Every horror fan breathed a huge sigh of relief when David Gordon Green walked away from remaking the 1977 classic, but sadly a new director has revealed his plans for a remake, and it sounds horrible.

Say hello (or piss off) to Luca Guadagino, director of Melissa P., A Bigger Splash and I Am Love. He revealed to Empire his plans for a remake of Suspiria, which is currently in pre-production. Grab a sick bag or a punch bag, because this will either make you throw up, or become so angry that you will need to punch something.

The film by Dario Argento was a very indicative moment of growing up for me because I saw it when I was 14,” the director tells Empire. “I think it changed me forever. I was obsessed [with Argento] through all my adolescence. [My version] is going to be set in Berlin in 1977. It’s going to be about the mother and the concept of motherhood and about the uncompromising force of motherhood. It’s going to be about finding your inner voice – the title is very evocative on these grounds.”

Guadagnino’s version, he says, will be very different. “The movie by Dario Argento was maybe a child of its own times. It’s very delicate; almost childish,” he added. “I have a very strong interest in German literature and film, so I think [my] Suspiria will have to focus very strongly on that moment in history, in 1977, when Germany was divided and a new generation was claiming and asking to recognize the debt of guilt that forged the new Germany after the war against the fathers who wanted to deny the responsibility.”

No, just no no no no, this is blasphemy and it sounds utterly ridiculous. Stop this nonsense right now!

The good news is that Argento is still developing a TV series of Suspiria.

Matt Wavish

Matt WavishA keen enthusiast and collector of all horror and extreme films. I can be picky as i like quality in my horror. This doesn't necessarily mean it has to be a classic, but as long as it has something to impress me then i'm a fan. I watch films by the rule that if it doesn't bring out some kind of emotive response then it aint worth watching.

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