Detention (2010): Available on Region One

Detention (2010)
Directed by: James D.R. Hickox
Written by: James D.R. Hickox, John Stienfield, Michael Muscal, Stephen Johnston
Starring: David Carradine, Rachel Sterling, Thomas Calabro

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQk4ZQgZ5MQ[/youtube]

Detention (2010)

(15 TBC) Running time: 84 minutes

Reviewed by: Matt Wavish, official HCF critic

First off, let me make this absolutly clear, this is NOT the recent advertised horror of the same name whose trailer actually looks kind of fun. The other horror called Detention is more a slasher comedy, whilst this bore fest is a sleep inducing spectacle of everything that can go wrong with a low budget horror. The film opens with a scene of bad acting, poor special effects and terrible timig and never really picks up from there. A young class mate is tricked by the more popular kids and locked in a room, andwhen a storm breaks out he panics and begs them to unlock the door. Problem is, he made a move of the main guys woman, and like a primate defending his territory, and even though they have broken up, it would appear the best course of action is to lock him in a room. Lightning strikes as a storm rages outside, it hits the room and sets the poor chap on fire and the bullies watch in terror as he burns to death.

Skip forward fifteen years (although skipping to the end would have been better!) and new pupils are now attending school, equally as dumb as the one’s before them. Being fifteen years later, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that the kids involved here will moslty be the children of those involced in the ‘accident’. Just odd that they all miraculosly end up in detention together. And even worse, it has taken the ghost of the ‘murdered’ boy fifteen years to return? The characters are all held in detention for various reasons which I will not waste my time with here, and not one of therm is likeable. We have the bullying black fella who can’t help but want to start a fight, and yet in the middle of being chased around the school by a ‘ghost’ he finds time to stop on stage with a girl he wants to impress. “I always wanted to be on stage, I was just too embarrassed to do so” Yeh, forget everyone thats dying around you and dress up and act out a scene from a play, thats what I’d do! There’s another kid who can’t help but put on an irritating Jamaican accent all the time, something which not only annoys his friend,  but annoyed the fuck out of me, there’s a Goth chick who never smiles, but is actually kind of cute, there’ the dodgy new teacher and the even dodgier headmaster played by David Carradine.

Hell, the cast can’t die soon enough, but then the deaths are so poorly staged you never really get any enjoyment out of them dying. The one and only highlight of the film is one of the lads becomes ‘possessed’ by the ghost of the dead guy, and this leads to some of the worst acting you will see all year, but it is so bad it is hilarious and provides some much needed comic relief. Nothing here is scary, or even enjoyable, this is just a very very bad film with a good idea and it could, and should have been a lot better than this piss poor attempt of a horror film.

Rating:

[pt-filmtitle]Detention[/pt-filmtitle]