WHAT IS IT ALL ABOUT:
According to an ancient Chinese myth, on the full moon of the seventh lunar month, the gates of hell open and the dead are freed to roam among the living. While honeymooning in China, a young newlywed couple takes part in a sacred event that honors these spirits. Unfortunately their enthusiasm borders on mockery and their disagreeable charm ends in angry glances among the locals. As night falls, their tour guide abandons them in a desolate field. What they thought was a joke is becoming far too real as they fight to survive the night of the Seventh Moon.
The Hughes Verdict
Seventh Moon answers one main question as to how the makers of The Blair Witch came up with the ingenious idea of how they let the actors film most of their scenes by themselves. It seems that one half of the director duo Eduardo Sanchez suffers from a severe case of shakes, a condition that stops him from holding a camera really steady for most shots, a slight problem for someone who is trying to make themselves a career as a Film Director!
This can only explain his effort here, an uneven horror that requires some pill taking as the headache you get after watching is the only thing that stays with you long after the credits roll. Crank’s Amy Smart is Melissa, on a trip around China with her boyfriend Yul who looks a lot like that guy from the Harold and Kumar films. Enjoying the relaxation and the sights of the beautiful city, they take a taxi trip with someone who at first I thought was Mr Miyagi but then realised it was the trainer from Kickboxer who went from training Van Damme to Sasha Mitchell. Getting lost in the wilderness, the driver gets out to ask for directions in the nearby town, but as a hour passes, and he does not return, the couple realise that this was not on the agenda, as the town is bordered up, and animals are left outside, it seems that there is a tradition in which once a year, on the seventh moon, lunar creatures return to earth for a serving of sacrifice, and it seems the newly wedded couple are on top of the feeding list. Can they survive until first light? and what other secrets do this small village hold?…….
Sanchez who will forever sell horror movies thanks to his Blair Witch legacy, is one of the most frustrated directors out there. His Alien Abduction feature Altered was hit and miss fare, but contained some great moments that you could not but help but praise. Seventh Moon is so like for like. A great opening is let down by a seen it all before plot, but still you get the odd moment of fantastic imagery, that makes you weep at how good this horror could have been.
The Creatures are more like the bastard offspring’s of Gollum but looking for meat than any precious ring! and they do at times create a surreal freaky image that seems more suited for a better horror film. Combined with a freaky score, this horror should at least have a much better score, but the simple way it is shot is a disaster that takes everything away from the film. How can you create any tension and feeling of dread when you can not even see what the friggin eck is going on. Sanchez probably no doubt influenced by the shaky cam horrors on the market, tries to create something similar here, but fails on all accounts, delivering a style that will leave many reaching for the off button. There is one laughable scene when the film goes into Descent mode and Melissa’s only light from her mobile phone goes out. Not only is she left in darkness, but so are we and what is the point of watching a horror film when you can not see NOTHING! I might as well have knocked off the telly, turned off the lights and sat at the empty screen and used my imagination, as that would probably have brought more scares than what we actually get here.
Even the plot which Sanchez again must take some of the blame, is filled with either cliches or a re run cycle. A car getting stuck in the mud twice?!!! is just lazy, showing a lack of imagination and quality, and the film goes from one situation to another and then back again which grates on the nerves.
The climatic showdown is also lost with the fast edits and it transcends into a laughable outcome that really brings to fore the lack of ideas, its simply a horror that had a great core at its heart, but not the writers to create the filler! Which is a rotten shame, as Sanchez shows in glimpses that he is capable of maybe matching his Blair show. There are tiny moments that are a joy, but its all washed away by some cringe worthy scenes that maybe shows that Sanchez may need Blair Witch 3 more than the dead in the water franchise needs him…….
OVERALL: A neat idea wasted by awful direction, it does contain some great horror visuals, but the routine plot and lack of any real bite makes it one of the lesser STD horrors of the year so far